My Personal Journey

On Christmas Eve Eve of 2008, I found the bittersweet answer to six months of health problem was the fact that I am gluten and dairy intolerant. Typically, when someone hears that I have food intolerance's they immediately say, "I could never give up wheat or dairy." My response is always the same, "If you experienced the pain I experienced, you wouldn't even hesitate."

During the summer of 2008, I experienced some very significant emotional trials in my life. At the top of the list was finally receiving treatment for a 20 year battle with disordered eating and body image distortion. I was in excellent hands with a wonderful nutritionist who taught me what "normal eating" is all about. During this treatment, I was required to keep a food journal documenting my intake. Towards the end of the summer, I noticed that I was rapidly putting on weight. I first thought, "Great. I can get over my eating disorder, but I have to be chubby in order to do it!?" Then I noticed that I was getting sick frequently after meals. Because I had this food journal, my dietician helped me look over it and neither of us could find the culprit.

During the fall, my symptoms persisted and worsened. I was finally healing from my emotional stress. I was happy and hopeful for the future. So why was I having depressive clouds come over me that zapped my energy one minute, and then turn around with major anxiety attacks a few hours later? I was feeling fine about my life, so why was my body reacting so contradictory?

I began tracking my symptoms. I have obsessive-compulsive disorder, and this only seemed to worsen. In addition, I experienced major abdominal bloating, to the point of gaining about 25 pounds. My tummy was distended after eating and I was very dehydrated. I fatigued quickly and had no energy. I had so much pain after eating certain foods with hours of bathroom time to follow. I had frequent mouth sores and dry lips. My teeth enamel began changing to a yellowish color in a pretty quick time frame. The depression episodes continued after eating certain foods, resulting in quick mood changes. My vitamin D level was below normal. I had brain fog. I experienced major aches and pains in my joints. The thing that scared me the most was when my arms, hands, and face would randomly fall asleep. I was convinced that I had MS.

I began googling my symptoms. I kept trying to push it aside and told myself that I was being a paranoid hypochondriac. Then, the final straw came. I made myself pancakes for dinner one night... Buttermilk pancakes with wheat germ in them. I don't know if I have ever felt so awful. For 2 days after that, my system was fighting with my symptoms full fledge. I decided to swallow my pride and talk to my doc.

I have a wonderful holistic MD who listened to my concern. After my blood test came back negative for gluten intolerance, I insisted on further testing per a friend's advice. My doctor skipped the colonoscopy, as this can be inaccurate, and I went straight for the stool test with Entero Lab.

December 27, 2008, I started my journey to healing by drastically changing my diet. I have a selfish and an unselfish reasoning behind this blog. Selfishly (and not in a bad way), I want to keep track of my journey. In addition, I was blessed with wonderful people in my life who helped me in my diagnosis and adjustments. (The average celiac is diagnosed 7 years after their first symptoms!) It is my hope that I can pay it forward to someone who is just starting the journey!

In this journey and my eating disorder journey, I have learned that life is about so much more than our bodies and food. It's ironic that I have always obsessed about what I eat. Now that I have to think about it, I wish I didn't have to! I am not a celiac. I am not a recovering eating disorder. I am not dairy intolerance. I am a child of God with a face, a name, a story, and a heart!